What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

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A black, white, Asian, and Mexican are walking down the street. This is showing a good diverse community.

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What's clear on the outside and grey on the inside? An elephant in a plastic bag.

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Two fish we're in a tank.. Yup.

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

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What? Chicken butt Why? Chicken thigh Who? Deez nuts

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here is a good joke... your moms a bitch END OF STORY!

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whats the difference between kids and jewish people? kids come home from summer camp

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

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How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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What did one dinosaur say to the other? Nothing and if you think dinosaurs talk you might need to be diagnosed for having Schizophrenia. Invega is a subtle treatment.

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A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

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What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops