Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

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Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

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guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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Tell me you're a rapist. You're a rapist. This joke makes no sense. Mashed potatoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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