tea with milk?

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

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What was Hellen Keller's dogs name? dhfgbvskjne How did Hellen Keller's dog die? Natural causes.

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how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

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my boloney has a first name its OSCAR, my boloney has a last name its MEYER.. now bend over son while i shove my boloney in ur butt!

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

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"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

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Why did the Italian family have spaghetti for dinner? Thats the only thing they had in the house

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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Who does creatine? James Cornish

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Why did the pig cross the road? To chase after his adopted chicken.

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How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops