Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? rockband

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What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

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How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her? By grounding her.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

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Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

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Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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Q: Why wasn't the baby playing with his blocks? A: Because his face was stapled to the floor

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what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

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guess what what ...

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Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

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How do you not get disappointed at the ending for "Mass Effect 3"? Don't play the game, dumbass.

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What did the docter say to its patient? What?? Im sorry sir you have aids

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

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What happened when the paraplegic man went into the bar? Nothing the man couldnt get into the bar because the bar has no wheelchair ramp.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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What's the difference between a Christian and a Jew? One believes in Jesus, the other doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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