A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

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Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

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Ubisoft presents a game by ubisoft

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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How do you blindfold an asian? step 1: Fold your blindfold into a triangle step 2: Wrap blindfold around the head of the asian step 3: Tie the blindfold on the back of the asians head step 5: You forgot 4 step 6: Your finished step 4: Tighten the blindfold Now you know how to blindfold an asian ˜´??

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I found my car in the lot with a broken tail-light and a note under the windscreen wipers. I accidentally reversed into your car, Lots of people saw me do it. They all think I'm writing down my name and details, Well, I'm not.

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

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What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

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Why did I deleted brian from my friend list ? Cuz he had brain tumor.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A dead zebra

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regoereiorgiorehgijreirehrfjirgjirejgruirehgrghehiiehaoiwpo;lkswpokewqoifgoieqjgiubtfoewfiir K.O

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Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

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What did the lion say on a hot day in Africa? Nothing, lions can't talk.

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why is kool-aid so sweet? Because it contains sugar

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Q: pete and re-pete were on a boat, pete fell off. who was left? A: i dont know, but why did pete fall off in the first place, that dumb ass

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Why did the black man commit suicide? Because the white man murdered him.

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Abe Lincholn had a son, But he died

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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