Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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Woody Allen once said, "I have had many romantic relationships in my life that were both complex and humorous."

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what do you call a black man falling off a cliff holy shit

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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Rose are red Violets are blue all I what to know is what do that mouth do

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How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

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Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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Democracy.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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how do you remove a black man from a car? Wash the bumper

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How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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Chuck Norris.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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