Why did the black man fall down? A guy pushed him.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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What did the bird say to the fence? Chirp.

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Q: What do you call a dear with no eyes A: Nothing - call an animal cruelty service

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

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If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

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do you know whats worse than a bad joke on antijoke.com the holocaust.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

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why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

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What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

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Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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What do they call Chinese food in China? Food

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

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What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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