Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a gun Get in the van

Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

why did the chicken cross the road? he saw a rather desperate looking homeless person coming towards him, and, realizing he had no change, figured it was the best way to avoid an awkward situation.

Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

What does Jason say when he rages on cod ? I hope your family gets slaughtered in front of him ..

I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

Whats worst than being raped by a black guy? Being raped by two black guys? You racist i'm calling the police.

Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

How do you drown a blonde? hold her head down until she stops breathing

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

Why did the duck cross the road? Because there was a gunman on the same side of the path and it would most likely be safer to avoid making eye contact

Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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