What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

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A black man a white man and an asian man walk into a bar have a few drinks and on thier drive home run over a three year old little girl and here to month old sister and they go to prison for the rest of thier lives (they shouldn't of let the asian drive)

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

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Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

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T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

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What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

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what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops