Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

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Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

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Albino African Americans

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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No antijoke here.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

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what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops