your so vein that doctors find you really helpful when giving you injections

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

how do u get a clown to stop smiling? Hit it with an axe!

Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

What's worse than the Holocaust? A Holocaust survivor. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

How many pancakes does it take to lift up a dog house? Silly goose, alligators can't fly!

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

What is wrong with being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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