A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

im @ work, LOL.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

thumb_up thumb_down -19

my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the black man say to the fat Irish lady? Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A blind man walks into a bar. But he wasn't hurt badly and continued on his way.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's as hard as rock and as light as a feather? Any object in the space, once the lack of gravity makes atoms to have not weight, since mass x gravity equals to weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's long and black? A line at KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

frogs are green and grass is greener i just blew up ur mom and ur the cleaner now get to work SLAVE

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops