What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

rent a cops

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

How does a black guy die? Unknown

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

Maroon 5 to a bitch: Cross my heart and hope to die... wait why don't i just kill you bitch!

a chicken walks into a bar and gets drunk. the locals then proceed to tell the police because the chicken was harrassing people after he got drunk

Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

What did the cute little girl get for Christmas? Raped

Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

do you have snow in your vagina? because i am going to plow you

HELLO EVERYONE

What did a pornstar say when she heard hard banging from the front door? Come inside.

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not a blind guy.

Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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