Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish.........That's a government lake. You're under arrest.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Whats fluffy, multicolored, and dances like a disco santaclaus? i don't know.

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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-Why did the jewish man chase after the penny? -Because he's poor and needs to feed his starving family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to

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Q. How much Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A. None, they just steal one.

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What do you call Rosa Parks? One bitchy negro. Just kidding she was a visionary for human rights, now you can't dislike this cause you'll be saying that Rosa Parks wasn't a visionary, take that blacks.

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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Whats fuzzy and pink? A pink fuzz ball

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What did the tooth brush say to the toothe paste? Minorities.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was among thousands of men who were also from Nantucket.

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what happened to the girl that didn't forward the threatening chain text to ten people? nothing.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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A hooker walks into a hospital. Only to find out that she has aids.

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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So there is a muslum, then he flew a plane into a building and died a sudden death. But he was wearing a helmet.

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What is smarter than a blind Mexican midget of average intelligence? A genius

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the kangaroo fall over? Because it fell over the dead koala

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curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

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Whats funnier than throwing a baby off the top of a building? The sound it makes when it hits the ground.

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A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

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There was once a boy named Aladin. He was very poor until he found a magic lamp. When he rubbed the lamp, a genie poped out of the lamp. He said... "I will grant you one wish, master" Aladin thought about this for a long time, until eventually he said... "I wish for all the chocolate in the world" "Very well, master" And the genie granted his wish and Aladin had all the chocolate in the world Unfortunately, because he ate so much chocolate, Aladin died of heart & liver failure

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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