how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

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Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Parkinson's dl;ghd;jgfldsj;foshdgoljdlkfnjslpaoijejknjvnoidnmaokepinjndonfvio

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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What did one blind person say to the other? Nothing. He is also mute.

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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