whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

A amazing I idiots D discover S sex

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? most likely one unless there is physical disability that makes this person incapable of this action

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

What do you do when a bomb is exploding 2 inches away from you? You die.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

Why did the boy fall off his skateboard before running into a cross-section? Because he was shot.

Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar. The bartender says " What are you drinking?"

Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

I am a dwarf and im digging a hole... lol jokes dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist

How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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