you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How do you make a person cry? Burn his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the chicken cross the road? If i knew, I'd tell you.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

thumb_up thumb_down -28

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

thumb_up thumb_down -28

what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Did you know, I have a black man in my family tree? He works for a lawn service.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's the best anti-pest control of all time???? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's the difference between a red door and a blue door? Fat black people.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What starts with P and ends with ORN? Porn

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by a serial rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops