What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

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I have a friend named Jay . But for short , he likes to be called J .

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How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

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A white man walked into a bar, and an indian walked into a totem pole...

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knock knock who's there bob bob who bob marley who else

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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why is andreas making a pizza? since he dosent get laid he likes the feeling of the sauce stinging on his dick

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A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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why do black people like watermellon? becasue it is a delicious red fruit at a wonderful price

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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Q.) What do you call a black man on the moon? A.) An astronaut.

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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What do u call 30000 Mexicans rolling Dow a hill. Hahaha your mom

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your pork? Finding half of a worm, because the worm you just ate is going to live in your stomach, breed, then come out your butt. Or the Apocalypse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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