Malcolm Johnson from Zenith windows, I was wondering if I could speak to you for a while about some fantastic offers which we currently have on double glazed windows....

A man walks into a bar he said oww when did this metel bar get here

What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

what does I.C.T mean when a teacher says it it means I cant teach

Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

Why was johnny so good at reading? Because he had 3. Toes

I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

whatt dont w do you call a person with legs that dont work Crippled

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

Whats an Anit-joke?? A joke that possesses the kind of humor based on the surprise factor of absence of an expected joke or of a punch line in a narration which is set up as a joke.

Hey I just met you you are a sneaker smell my gym socks and then pick oot throughyour nose

What did the sleepy man say to his wife? I'm sleepy.

Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

How do you teach a kid to ski you strap it to the back of a polar bear

What's gay and nobody likes? Ryan's combover

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

An automobile mechanic busted an engine fuse. A prostitute had oral sex with a Marine. An Inuit hunter detonated a sea mammal with TNT. What do they all have in common? They all blew a seal.

A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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