A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

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Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

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But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am white and I like cold food

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What is both bold and brash? Fox

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

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Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

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hi

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how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Where did Susie go after the explosion? I don't know: she was nowhere near the explosion at the time that it happened. She probably got up to use the bathroom.

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What do you say to a black man in the morning? Good morning

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What is black and white and red all over? Black people in a blender. I lied about the white

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

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Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

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a boy with asperges asked me a question today he asked me again and again because he has asperges

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What Batman said to Robin before they got in the car? -Get in the car Robin!

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

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Q: One little blond girl went walking on her own. A: 17 didn't come back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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