What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

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why did the shark bite the surf board? It thought it was turtle.

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My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

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Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

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knock knock whos there? police police who? police your house is on fire and your kid just died from broncitisand i just farted and u get a tickit because u answered the door naked

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whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

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Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

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why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

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Excuse me, do you have any gnats? Yes, plenty. Thank you

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I don't get it

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

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Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

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knock knock Goodbye

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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