What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

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what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

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there are three types of people in this world, those who can't count, and those who can. STFU, you corny loser

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Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

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how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

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Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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DERP

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Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

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How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it.

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

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How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

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the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

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What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

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If there's something strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The Police.

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Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

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What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

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It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I just found out my wife has cervical cancer."

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A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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