Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

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Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

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Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

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What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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why do jews like weed? A) because they are used to being baked.

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What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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yo momma so old that when she whent to school there was no history class

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck? Nothing. Ducks cannot speak, therefore this description negates all known living organisms.

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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Q: Why did the Mexican mother leave her baby in the hot car during summer? A: Because she was irresponsible and forgetful.

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What did the Brontosaurus say to the Triceratops? Nothing. Neither of them have ever existed.

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what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

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Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

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Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

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What do you call a man holding a bible? A man holding a bible. What do you call a woman holding a bible? A women holding a bible. What do you call a man and a women holding a bible? A man and a women holding a bible.

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops