How do you greet your great great grandmother born in 1738? Hey, what's up, hello.

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

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why was the blond so easy,because ALL blonds are whores.

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Why did Sally cry at the wedding? somebody shot her future husband.

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Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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Q. Why did little suzy fall off her swing? A. She dosen`t have any arms. Knock knock. Whos there? Not Suzy.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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Why was the man burnt? Cause he fell in a fire

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Why are pills white? Cause they work.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven was a registered sex offender.

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What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of.

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What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

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What did the woman with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A diagnosis.

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We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

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Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops