How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

What did the black boy find on his doorstep A package from his grandparents in Australia

what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

A possesed goat: "moo"

Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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