How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

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jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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Why does Suzie like to wear sunglasses? Because she's blind.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow And daisies can be a wide variety of colours.

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A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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You sick fiend

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Why did a black person beat a white person in a race? The white person was hindered because a polar bear was biting their leg the entire time.

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Q:what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? other person: What? A:how am i suppose to know I'm not a lawyer.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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What do communists and strawberries have in common? You can eat them.

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Unless she's particularly short, then she may need to get a friend, who may or may not be blonde, to help by holding the ladder.

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So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

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Why can't Sally use the swings? Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there?? ... Not Sally.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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