A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

Why did the man kill the hamster? To get to the other side.

What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and gives a heavy sigh. The bartender asks, "What's wrong?" The guy says, "Nothing."

What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

Theres two things i hate in this world... racists . . . and black people

there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

Jack and Jill went up a hill to snort a little coke, Jack felt horny , so did Jill. But unfortunately Jack cant's maintain an erection no matter how turned on he is.

Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

What did the young Muslim man have attached to him? A book-bag, it was is his first week college and he eager for an education.

My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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