What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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What's the most popular fruit in the U.S.? Bananas What's the most popular vegetable in the U.S.? Stephen Hawking

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What did little ben get for christmas? A dead grandma

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Why did the dog chase the cat. Cause he was fking hungry

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Shes got a big booty so I call her by her first name, women deserve respect.

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Friend: Do you want to go to the bar or see a movie first? Me: Yes.

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Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

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Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

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What's worse than a shotgoun to the balls? Nothing.

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A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you so much That is a an example of the 2nd person and the identification of plants and their colors

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How many easily offended people does it take to change a light bulb? Shut up, that's not funny!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face is so ugly it belongs in a zoo, but dont be sad, i forgot the rest, so you wont feel really bad. I need a rhyme, treasure chest.

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yo mamas so poor she should probably consider finding a job

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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my throat Really started to hurt, like reallly badly, and i remember On sponge bob, he laughed so much his laugh box broke. well, my throat really hurts. please help! can i get my laugh box back? will i never be able to laugh again and have to get it replaced like squidward did?!!? please answer, i have a friend who would probably give me part of her laugh box, but she Laughs like a hyena

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smell the vitamin C

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A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

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Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

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What do men and parking spots have in common? Both often have cars on top of them. Vehicular manslaughter is a serious issue.

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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On a tusday night, three guys walk into a bar After realising they have to work they proceed to exit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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