Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

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What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

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If 1+1=2 why does 2+2 not equal 3?

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

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what you get time to go with? - a clock

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A hat.

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How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

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How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

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What did the boy get at the bowling alley for his birthday? a corpse. *from Bones

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KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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Man says, "Hello" Girl, "Do you wanna go out?" Man, "With you?" Girl, "YES!" Man, "NO, bye!"

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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Why doesn't God like fruitcake? Because God doesn't exist.

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I'm Andrew Schmitt

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Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

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How many blondes does it take to play a game of hide and seek? One ... ;)

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad this joke is over?

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What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

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Whats the difference between a jew and a canoe? Canoes weren't killed by Hitler

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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