What did the crazy asian man say just before he died? He didn't say anything- he was in an 18 month long coma due to a brain stem stroke. He left behind a wife, a 3 year old daughter and a newborn son.

What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

How does a black man have sex? He inserts his penis into his partners vagina, then slides it out, then inserts it back in, and repeats this motion untill he has reached his climax and ejaculates!

How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

What's weird about four black men in a toilet? No one got shot.

Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

what do you call 20 black people under the ocean? a tragic boating accident

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

I do u blow up a house U put dynamite in it

So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" It proceeds to then crap on the floor and walk out,because its a horse.

knock, , knock , who's there the gas man the gas man who ? the gas man who is gonna turn your gas off !

roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

Whats the difference between a duck? Both legs are of the same length. Especially the left one.

Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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