a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

Yo mama so old when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

Knock knock Whos there A dead boy a dead boy who A dead boy who started tobuy drugs and didn't have the money for it and his family loved him and he was going to go to college

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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