Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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Knock knock Whos there Who Who who Don't stutter it was just a joke

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Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

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A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

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Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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An orthodox rabbi, a Methodist preacher and a Muslim Cleric walk into a bar and blow that month's tithings on video slots.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

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Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

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What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

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I just started the seafood diet. It consists primarily of eating fish due to its high nutritional content.

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What do you call a group of geese? A giggle

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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Nero, man, I mean I will hurt you, I am on my way to the hospital, and seriously that pic does not look real, seriously on a hospital? I mean man, I am really sorry! I nearly killed you, how was i supposed to know you do not care about your teeth and take half a bottle of that calcium stuff? My mom? Yeah sure! She laughed at the message you sent her, and if you touch my sis, ill kill you, anyway I am on my way, you better change your mind or I will kick your ass!

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What do black people and asians have in common? arms

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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