Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

thumb_up thumb_down +30

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

thumb_up thumb_down +28

My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

thumb_up thumb_down +28

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +26

knock knock. who's there. gestapo.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

wanna hear a joke? womans rights

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops