so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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In which state does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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So this guy filled with blood, right? This caused his veins to protrude and him to bleed strongly when he cut his wrists with razors later that night- because of his struggle with depression and substance abuse.

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Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

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theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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What do black people and asians have in common? arms

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

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What did the mother say to her color blind son when he was about to take his first car ride alone after he got his license? Good luck

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if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops