Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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Six hats walk out of a garden. When mustard offal fruit paps.

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Two baby seals walk into a club.

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Q: Why do circles make such good friends? A: They don't. They're shapes and there cannot have friends

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Vote this down and get DOXED

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How do you drown a blonde? Same as anyone else. Tie three-hundred cinder blocks to her and drop her into a lake.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me, wondering why your not naked.

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Why does Apple hate Blackberry? They don't fruit can be rivals.

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Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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A black man and a hispanic man are in a car. Who is driving? The guy who didn't call shotgun.

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

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If an oak tree falls in the woods, and the tree has 3 squirrel nest in them, then does a whale jizz in the ocean?

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How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

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Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

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roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't so much cross the road as he did go down the road, to the supermarket, where he was sold to a family of 5, and taken down yet another road to the family's house, where they enjoyed a nice family dinner.

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Little Timmy enjoyed school He went to Sandy Hooks

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What happened When The lion asked the dog of a soda can? The giraffe who is taller the lion or the whos the fastest?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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