What is the last thing to go through a flies head before it hits a windshield. Nothing because flies aren't capable if rational thought.

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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Yo mamma's so fat that the gravity required to keep her on the ground is significantly smaller than an average sized human.

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it was all Tagart

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

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So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

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You killed my brother and call me the antichrist? Its lovable: Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the **** are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming? He died for their sins, not for yours... WELCOME TO HELL!

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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360 NO SCOPE

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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Q: Why didin't fat billy take the last peace of pie? A: cuz he was not hungry

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Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona Charming Mrs Fiona 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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

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Ok class, we are doing arts and crafts today, but remember, have fun and be creative... Thats what she said

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Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

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What's worse than leaving the maternity ward with the wrong child? Being a parent.

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What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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