What's green and red? A frog in a blender

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?white vans

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What falls down, but never gets back up? A dead person.

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Roses are gray Violets are black Don't judge me I'm color blind>.>

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Why do people laugh at anti-jokes? Because of a chemical reaction to a neurological phenomenon that results from the brain's response to external stimuli.

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What do you do when a bomb is exploding 2 inches away from you? You die.

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God and Allah are having a metaphysical picnic, God says to his fellow deity: "Why do you think so many humans have been killed in our names?" Allah muses upon this for a moment and replies: "Because they think we exist."

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I have a black friend that recently went to the doctor for a full checkup. I saw him today, and he we was dressed to the nines in a very expensive suit. "What's with the suit," I asked. "My doctor told me I'm impotent! So I thought, if I'm going to be impotent, then it'll be harder to attract a long term mate without the ability to give her children someday. So I've decided to showcase my impeccable taste in style to make up for it." He seemed really bummed out, so I gave him a hug and we went and had some ice cream.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

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want to hear a yo mama joke sure Your dad

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What did the boy say after he fell out of the tree? Nothing, he died.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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What's green and has wheels? Your mom.

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Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

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knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

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"What the hell is wrong with you?" "..."

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Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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Why did the dog bark? Because he wanted to.

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god sent down his only son, " his only son." so in gods eyes we are a bunch of girls.

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What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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