How do you kill Chuck Norris? Shoot him in the face.

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What's worse than homework? A basket full of mutilated puppies....

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? El-if-iknow

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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Why was the sock sad? Impossible. Socks dont have emotions.

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Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

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Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school? Both of his legs were amputated. He can't ride a bike ever again.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

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why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

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A white man applies for a job two weeks later he finds out he lost the job to a hardworking Mexican who went to college and payed his debts

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops