What's red & is bad for your face? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

My mom says hi ............ Jk she says hello

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's long hard and black A drain pipe

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Golf.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did the marines cross the minefield safely at night? Under a full moon

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the key to a good anti-joke? A disappointing or intellectual punch-line said in a calm and passive tone.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

1 white girl and 2 black men -TRAGIC

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why was 6 afraid of 7? Because ever since 3 died, 7 had changed. He had turned aggressive and randomly snapped and hit out at some of the other numbers for no apparent reason.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

There was once a boy named Aladin. He was very poor until he found a magic lamp. When he rubbed the lamp, a genie poped out of the lamp. He said... "I will grant you one wish, master" Aladin thought about this for a long time, until eventually he said... "I wish for all the chocolate in the world" "Very well, master" And the genie granted his wish and Aladin had all the chocolate in the world Unfortunately, because he ate so much chocolate, Aladin died of heart & liver failure

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A black person dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. What's long and hard and full of seamen? A. A penis. Oops, I misspelled "semen". Sorry. Also, to clarify, this doesn't describe the normal state of the average penis. Usually they are flaccid, and they can only be said to be "full of semen" at the exact moment of ejaculation.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you get when you cross rice flour,vegetable oil,corn oil,cottonseed oil,soybean oil,dried potatoes,corn flour,maltodextrin,wheat starch,modified rice starch,sugar and mono-and-di-glycerides,malted barley flour,wheat bran,dried black beans and salt? Pringles,Multi Grain,truly original

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? Just a sort of mixed bird thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A woman tells her boyfriend that shes going shopping. Later that day the boyfriend sees her in an alley giving a blow job to a stranger so he says "What are you doing here?"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops