Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

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What's the most confusing day in the ghetto? Fathers day.

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What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

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Boys have swag, real men have class

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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What's the difference between a lamp?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops