What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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What do u do to blow off steam? I simply go to the top of the empire states building, poor gasoline in a bag, put a baby in it, light it on fire, and through it off the side. problem?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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