Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

PLEASE HELP IM TRAPPED IN SOME GUYS HOUSE PLEASE SOMEBODY HAS TO SEE THIS IF I TEXT HE WILL SEE IT IM AT

meatspin.fr

What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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