Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

It's okay, I got the yogurt.

Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

women rights

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Sara had no arms! Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sara!

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 had a lot of PCP went crazy and shoved a gun down 6's throat

John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...