Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? hes retarded.

A black person went into a store and paid full price for his tv

what's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? a Jew is a person and a pizza is a food

What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

What's old and wrinkly? old people

Why wouldn't Helen Keller be able to drive if she was alive today? She would be inside her coffin not knowing how to get out

Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

What's fat and ugly? Your face ... But only if its fat and ugly

How do you get a fat man to go outside? Blow up his house

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, but it was delicious.

There's my tractor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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