This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

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Yo mama's so fat that they have to grease the door frame and hold a twinky on the other side to get her through.

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Q: How do you make a black man think you're racist? A: Racism

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How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

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So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

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Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

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what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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Charlie Sheen

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops