How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

You know what they say about a man's feet... No i don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Whatever their names happen to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

thumb_up thumb_down +25

make me a sandwich! what kind?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Justin's life

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

thumb_up thumb_down +23

-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whats Pink and fluffy? Yellow fluff thats been dyed pink :D

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops