Why does my friend pick up garbage? Because he is a garbageman.

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Yo mamma is so fat that she can fit through a skinny doorway. Actually, yo mamma isn't fat at all, but rather a normal sized woman secure in her weight.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it's not gonna

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What's black and white and red all over. Nothing, that's a contradiction.

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Pop Fiction last words. guess who edition: "Okay okay you win again Batman! Ahahaha hohohoho hehehehe! Wanna hear a new jo... Eh... what are you doing with that gun?" "Why did I not just take a step or two to the side during the five hours and over thirty episodes he kept charging that Kamehameha?" "Bah I cannot die as long as my ego is full! Are these really the ratings on my latest game? H0moerotic? Childish? A sociopath? Oh man..." Moral: Your red thumbs cannot hurt me! Im the moralmanBitch! HOAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

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What was hitlers least favorite pokemon? Hitler didnt have a least favorite pokemon because hitler died long before the idea of pokemon was created.

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

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I went to work today....

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Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

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Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

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why was smokey bear sad? he got cancer from smokeing

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Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

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Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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How did the deaf girl die? I beeped but she didnt hear me

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Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

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Heeeheeeerrrrrrrrrrr

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they have been run over by a car? Dead.

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Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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