Why'd the Squirrel fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. ... Hah.

Why is 16 scared of 17? Because 17, 18, 19 *crickets*

BIG MAC'S

Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

So theres a man, a horse, and a piglet in a helicopter. Upon noticing this, the pilot jumps out of the plane and the animals go crashing to their doom.

How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

how do you delete your joke off anti-joke? you don't.

What's 2+2? Fish

what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

What happened to the baby seal who went clubbing? He met a nice woman and contracted HIV from her after engaging in unprotected sexual intercourse after taking her to his flat.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did jenny fall off the swing? ...Cause she has no arms Knock, Knock Who's there? not jenny

Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

A bear wakes up from hibernation and is hungry. He sees a nearby forest cabin and decides to see if he can find food inside. The bear breaks into the cabin and thus the people staying there frantically run away to call animal control.

Yo mama so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl! I'm sorry,that was just really rude of me. I've been talking to my therapist and I think this insolent behavior came from my dad. I always wanted his approval but he always liked my brother more and blah blah yak yak.....

There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

Why did the chicken walk across the road? Because chickens cannot fly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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