why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

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What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

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Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

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Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

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How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

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Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

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Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

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What did the old man say to the young man? Nothing, the old man was dead.

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The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

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Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

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Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

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What's worst than your favorite football team losing the football? Giving birth to a stillborn child.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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id give my right arm to be ambidextrous

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.

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Screw it you write the joke.

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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That moment when the worst part of the movie, is when your pregnant wife pees on the couch.....

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A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

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Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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