Are you 9/11 because i would like you to destroy my tower.

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, he died.

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A baby seal walks into a bar... The bartender looks at it and says: too young.

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What's orange, brown, and blue? An orange, brown, and blue object.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

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Roses are red violets are blue..... I have normal vision

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What do you call a sausage with no sauce? A giraffe.

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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How do you get dislikes on anti-joke.com? You can dislike your own post from several different IP addresses.

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What did the student say to the teacher, after being assigned homework? This isn't my best subject, can I stay after class for tutoring?

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how do you make a cripple depressed? stairs..

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Hitler walks up to a little girl at a concentration camp: - How old are you? - I'm turning 7 tomorrow! - Nope.

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Person A: Knock Knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest. Open the door. Person B: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest, open the door wh-- Suddenly the door is smashed open. Tear gas grenades are rolled in, temporarily blinding Person B. He is then dragged out of his apartment by nine federal agents who proceed to beat him and throw him into the back of an FBI van.

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What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

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I told my two lesbian friends I wanted to join them. I am a priest in a Gay Marriage friendly state and they are happily married.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a platypus? Well, I don't think it's genetically possible by nature, but Turtpus is a pretty funny name.

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to their son who got an A- in algebra? How do I know? I don't speak Chinese!

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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What's the hardest part of rollerblading? Telling your dad you're gay.

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face"? The horse does not respond, because it is a horse and lacks any cognitive ability to speak or understand English. Instead, it becomes confused by its surroundings, takes a dump on the floor, and gallops out of the bar knocking a few tables over in the process.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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