What's green, three feet tall, and can live forever? Definitely not Julie Andrews.

A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

why was smokey bear sad? he got cancer from smokeing

Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

knock knock whos there santa santa who .....long pause he doesnt exist now go shoot urself

What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

Lady gaga suposedly has a wener.What does that make her? A man

A couple of years back a went to chile for a day, I was then trapped underground for 70 days...

Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

I HATE GEORGE LOPEZ

Buy a SHOTGUN!!!!

Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

What's more likely to happen in 2011 than the rapture? Finding my real parents.

What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

why was kade sad? he shit himself

Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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