How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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"Where are my shoes?" asked the man. "On your feet," I replied. "You are a paraplegic and have no feeling from the waist down."

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What did catwoman say to batman? meow.

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I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Young Billy was arrested today for saying he was going to be a terrorist for Halloween.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

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The cream, it is coming

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Recycled jokes are about as good as a scalar roundabout... [L]

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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What do you call a black man driving a fire truck? A firefighter you racist.

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What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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1+2 = 6

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

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What did the rat say to the dog? Nothing, he is a rat and therefore incapable of speech.

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops